Oh What A Night….. And Day…..

With 5 days to go to my due date I sort of feel as though I’ve not been able to fully relax on maternity leave yet.  With having the builders in I’ve not had my house to myself for the duration, and now they’ve completed and we’re having the issues over the extra money they want that is stressing me out.

This morning I received news that where I work are closing the campus and relocating to Stoke.   Admittedly its only 30 minutes away but it’s a nightmare of a journey and there will be redundancies before that happens anyway.   Pretty much we’ve known all admin will be restructured for this September so we’ll be culled before the move, but to think our town is losing its Uni campus is a blow as well.   I’ve been working there for 13 years and have really liked it.  It was a great place to work.

When I went off for maternity with Joel I knew I’d be going back there and what I’d be doing and now I’m facing a very uncertain future.  We don’t know whether the nursery on site will be sold off, so where this baby will go I’m not sure, I wanted him to go there too as it’s been so good for Joel.   I don’t know if I’ll even have a job and if I did get one of the new posts, what I’d be doing and whether I could remain part time.  I don’t like feeling so out of control of my future.

On Tuesday Joel came down with a little cough.  He went to nursery yesterday and was happy enough, but still coughing but last night was awful.   He got a very high fever, woke every couple of hours so I was up and down with him, trying to remember when he last had Calpol or Ibuprofen, giving him water, cuddles, stories and at 5am he finally seemed to fall into a proper sleep and his temperature came down.   But he fell asleep in my bed so I was evicted to the spare room!  Part of me thought that as Steve had said he’d be on Joel duty for the morning I’d get to lie in a bit but at 8.15am I heard Joel crying so went in to see what was going on and Joel was sat next to Steve in bed, crying as Daddy wouldn’t wake up.  I was cross to say the least.  I woke Steve up and told him I’d had about two hours sleep, and how could he ignore Joel crying next to him in bed!  He has to learn to hear him and not zone him out.   It’s worrying that this will happen after regular nights of no sleep with a new born and I’ll have to depend more on my parents than my husband for nap times which I think is wrong and letting Steve get away with his responsibilities.

Anyway, Joel was not well all day and I got him into the Doctors for 11.30.   We got to the surgery and after waiting ages (you can tell when he’s properly ill as he sits quietly on my knee) we saw the doctor to be told that he’s got a chest infection.  He seems to come down with these things so fast.   So we’ve got antibiotics and chocolate buttons to help him get better.

It’s just been stressful frankly so far with too much going on!  With Joel, I remember just sitting in the garden in the sunshine reading books.   This time my days to myself I was so looking forward to just haven’t happened what with one thing and another!!  I guess it’s good training for multi tasking with two children.

Here’s hoping I get to sleep a bit better tonight.

39 Weeks

How far along:  39 weeks today.

Total Weight Gained: I’ve not stood on scales again this week.  I’m past the point of caring!!!  And eating too many doughnuts for the news to be good!

Maternity Clothes:   are just getting too small!  I keep finding that my tummy is hanging out of the bottom of jumpers and they aren’t quite covering me properly!!!  And the most annoying thing is that I have to wash everything after wearing it once as when I’m eating I just can’t seem to not spill food down my front!  I’m worse than Joel.   If I had any sense I’d tie a tea towel around my neck but with not being able to sit as close to the table, or bend at all, there’s more spillage time getting food from my plate to my mouth!!!

Stretch Marks:  Still a giant shiny planet of a tummy.  I feel as though the stomach has dropped now though.  There’s more gap between boobs and bump this week although I am getting lots of high rib kicks still so maybe baby is long and stretching out.

Sleep:    Still not great.   By 4-5am I’m just so achey I struggle to sleep.  My ribs and pelvis are painful.  Daytime naps are helping me through.  I shall have a quiet day tomorrow!!

Best Moment of the Week:   I am feeling very sad for saying this but on getting all Joel’s old baby toys out which had been at my sisters they all smelt really fusty as she’d left them in a bag under the stairs and they’d got really dusty.   I stuffed them all in a pillow case and ran them through the washing machine hoping that any jingly bells and rattley things would still jingle and rattle on the other side and they’ve all come out beautifully!!  They’re just all lined up on the clothes airers drying at the moment and have kept their colour and all smell lovely and fresh.   So that has pleased me a lot!!  I know they wouldn’t cost a lot to replace and babies don’t need a lot of toys anyway, but I’d have been a bit gutted had they had to all go.

Movement:  I was a bit worried over the weekend when I didn’t feel as though I was getting normal levels of movement.  I was on the verge of ringing delivery to ask to be checked but did get some little movements which reassured me.  On Friday I had a bath and felt as though baby had changed sides to the right side so put the difference down to that.  And today I have been positively pulverised again with lots of pressure, stretching and tightenings so things are as normal again for this baby.  I’m sure Joel wasn’t this wriggly!!  And I’m booked in to the midwife again tomorrow.  After not going on Weds for a 38 week appointment I was stressing I should have gone to be on the safe side so am having a 39 week appointment instead!!  I guess I won’t see her next week anyway as if baby isn’t here we will be at the consultants office instead.

Food Cravings:   ARgh, I’ve eaten way too many doughnuts this week.  My mum kept buying them.  And popcorn!  I mean that’s almost healthy isn’t it?  I got a big bag of sweet and salty and scoffed it in one sitting when Steve went out on Saturday as I didn’t want to have to share it!  He’s terrible as he goes on about how he hate popcorn, but whenever I have it, he wants to try it, then decides he was right all along and doesn’t like it.  So I resent him that one piece as it could have gone to me who appreciates it!!

Gender:  He’s a little man!

Belly Button:  What belly button?!  It’s like its on the dark side of the moon at the moment.

What I miss:  Sleep.  Not aching.   Being able to bend.   I had to get Steve to moisturise my legs and feet the other night.  He hates touching creams so looked at my legs as though they were made of rotten fish or something.  He didn’t even use two hands to do a nice massage, just poked me gingerly with one hand whilst grimacing.  Tch.

What I’m looking forward to:  Erm, I don’t think I can actually say I’m looking forward to labour.  I’ve been ignoring it but with one week to go, the realisation that it’s looming is suddenly keeping me awake at night.  Watching One Born Every Minute doesn’t help.   I don’t want to embarrass myself and be the wailing woman who loses control but I don’t know how I’ll be at all, since my last experience was pretty awful anyway!!  I don’t think I wailed.  I think I just zoned out and concentrated on the gas and air to make the time pass for 6 hours.  But yes, getting the baby out is the main priority now.  Finally meeting the little boxer who has been pulverising me from the inside for so long.

Milestones:  One week to go is a bit of a milestone.  The fact that my next blog post could be a birth announcement is rather exciting.  I’m pretty much ready.  The house is ready (except the one room I wanted to get done and hasn’t is our bedroom so that’s a shame) but the nursery is all done and everything is clean and washed and I’ve enjoyed sorting it all out.  The pram and car seat are ready and waiting.  Even Steve is saying he’s getting excited!  I guess he’s that bit older now and all his networking folk keep emailing him asking how things are.  Last time he seemed to stay in denial until the emergency c-section!  I’ve told him no games or laptops in the hospital this time.  He has to focus on helping me and do whatever I say.   And I will have his phone confiscated if needs be.  I can imagine tweeting out to his groups and I do not want that at all.   I don’t even want to announce if I’m going into hospital as it could always be a false alarm.  I just want to announce when baby is here, what his name is and a few details.   I think that’s much nicer.   I just wish we knew what his name was.   We’ve got a short list again, but are deliberating.   My Great Aunty Joan is currently in a respite home with leukaemia and getting weaker every day.   She’d love to know his name before she passes away but she’s holding on till the 12th February apparently (as that is when she was diagnosed with having 3 months to live and she wants to make it a full 12 months as that’s the way she is!!!) and James was her father’s (and my Grandad’s) name so I think that will be a middle name and will please her.  The other names are posing a problem as Steve doesn’t like my thoughts and although I don’t dislike his, he only seems to like names starting with ‘J’ which I wonder will be too similar to Joel.  And with James as a middle name that will be a ‘JJ’ which isn’t terrible, it just seems like we only like one letter of the alphabet!!  Had this one been a girl she’d have had Joan as a middle name, and indeed if we ever do have a girl, Joan will be a name for her.  And it’s another ‘J’ name!  We’re so stuck on ‘J’!!

Bump Pic:  



I’m feeling a bit nostalgic today.

It’s been 10 years since my Grandma died and she was such a lovely lady.

She was an old school Grandma.  Born in 1907 she died at 96 years old.  I remember her always being a lot older than other peoples grandmas but that was just the way my Grandma was.  She was over 70 when I was born!

She was the second to youngest of 13 and born into a working class family in Tunstall, Stoke on Trent.   She had to leave school at 13 to go to work and trained as a lithographer in the potteries.  I guess that’s partially why my family all have such an affinity with china and always have to check under plates in restaurants to see where it was produced!!

I’m not sure totally how she met my Grandpa, but he was a bank manager and considered out of her league!  His two sisters tried to persuade him against her but they married and had two children before WWII and then two afterwards as Grandpa was in Africa for a lot of the war.   My mum was the youngest born when Grandma was 45 (thus the older than most Grandmas).  I never knew my Grandpa as he died before my parents got married.

She was such a constant in my life and we used to visit every Tuesday whilst growing up.  My parents moved back to the midlands to be nearer our grandparents when I was born as they wanted us to have our Grandparents in our lives.  When she got older and I was working at Wedgwood I would go for my tea once or twice a week and do little jobs for her.   And we had daily visits nearer the end once she had to go into hospital.

She was a very gracious lady and I remember we would get to her house before lunch time to find homemade soup ready on the stove, or sandwiches all made and cut into triangles with fillings like tinned red salmon and cucumber (Grandma would pickle the slices first) mock crab (carrot and cheese mixed with salad cream) and corned beef mashed with ketchup and horse radish, and lots of homemade cake,   Afternoon tea would consist of freshly made drop scones and sitting round the table with a pot of jam and real butter, a tea pot with leaves so we had to remember to use the strainer and proper Royal Albert cups and saucers.   It may seem like a fath now in todays society where a bag in a mug is the norm, but learning to pour tea properly certainly makes a more special occasion.  And when I visited The Ritz for afternoon tea for a friends hen party I was the only one who seemed to know the etiquette behind the ceremony for which I was very thankful to Grandma.

I do feel sad that she never got to meet Steve, or see my wedding, meet Joel or this new baby.  Joel’s middle name of Lewis is for Grandma as that was her maiden name.  She was so supportive of all my extra curricular activities.  She encouraged our music lessons, and thats how I learnt to play the piano and violin.   She loved that I enjoyed guides and the outdoors and singing in choirs.  She always came to my concerts and had strong mints in her handbag to give me afterwards!!

She believed in education and due to having to leave school early to work made time later in her life to make it up and was gaining higher education credits from Keele University to work towards a degree.   She used to go away for writing weekends and loved writing poetry, painting and she had her own little kiln to paint china.   We had many lovely weekends away with her in the Lake District and Wales.

I guess you never stop missing the people who had a big impact in your life.   She was a wonderful Christian lady and helped make me who I am today and I hope that she would be proud of where I am now.



I don’t know what men think sometimes at all.   Or in fact, ever!  And they think we women are hard to work out.

Take this morning for example.

I woke at 4.30am with painful hips, ribs and pelvis.  I lay in bed until I just had to get up to ease the weight on my sides and went downstairs.   I was hungry so had some cereal and a cup of tea then worried that I hadn’t felt much baby movement over the past day.  I watched a few episodes of ‘The Good Wife’ to distract myself and try to monitor movement before feeling so tired again by 8am when I heard Joel up and about.  He’d been into Steve in bed who hadn’t woken up.  I got Steve up to sort Joel out and gave him clothes to dress Joel in, told him to sort breakfast and went back to bed.  I slept well and woke at 9.40.

Then I found Steve had done nothing all morning.  He’d laid on the sofa to doze some more, hadn’t dressed Joel, hadn’t tidied, hadn’t washed up or walked the dog (all things I would have normally done on getting up under regular circumstances).   He was due to manage the sound desk at church and had to be there for 10am but needed a shower.  By 9.40 he was in the shower and at 10.10am he left the house to go and set up the sound equipment for a service which begins at 10.30am and is meant to be having sound checks by 10.10!!!

His parting comment was ‘I refuse to rush on a Sunday’.   Well, had he actually got himself sorted when he first got up, there would be no rushing and as a result he was very rushed but just didn’t care.  I don’t get how he can’t see things that need doing.  I would love, just once to come downstairs after having had a lie in (which doesn’t happen all that often, but at the moment my sleep is so bad I’m being a lot more forceful about it!!) and find he’s sorted all the chores which are now waiting and looking at me 😦

The other issue is the baby movement.  I had another cup of tea and the heat of it seems to have caused some wiggling.  I noticed in the bath last night that my tummy was lurching to the right rather than the left and I was getting little brushy strokes on the left side so I wonder whether baby has moved down and twisted sides.  That would explain why things feel a bit different today.  As long as he’s not gone breech or turned back up i guess its all ok.   I will keep checking today though and call the delivery suite if I’m worried by lunchtime.  Right now I’m trying to rest and relax for a quiet morning whilst Steve has Joel at church.  No doubt he’ll be using me as an excuse as to why he’s late and add extra drama 😦

My other gripe about Steve stems from the argument over tiles we had at Christmas where he berated me over buying bathroom tiles.   I had the final bathroom invoice from the builders the day after I’d enjoyed my first bubble bath in our lovely bathroom and I was so relaxed and happy for one evening.  Plus my best friend from school who has been trying to get pregnant for over two years and has just had her first bout of ivf rang to tell me she was 13 weeks pregnant and it had worked first go which has a 33% chance of success!!!  I was over the moon for them!

Anyway, the bill came in and they’d added an extra £1400 to it!!!!  I opened the email and instantly felt sick.   Getting money out of Steve for house things is difficult enough and I just thought Steve would flip out and have a go at me about it.  He had a busy work day on Friday so I didn’t tell him straight away as I thought he’d be better off focusing on his new client and filming his awards ceremony that evening.   He had a good day and I had a privately stressy one wondering how we’d get the money, how they could add extra on like that without discussing it first, whether it was my fault, and pretty much feeling wretched all day.  Steve had really seemed to like these builders and had asked them for quotes on the garden jobs and widening our drive and rebuilding the wall and I saw these things disappearing away, never to be done as Steve seems to have to know who is doing the jobs and develop a sense of trust with them before being happy about paying them!!!

Anyway, Steve got back about midnight and I’d tried to sleep but just couldn’t switch off so sat up and waited for him to get in.  I had looked online and the law was totally on our side about it as they’d given us a written quote of £2498 for the job.  They’d even asked for an advance midway through so we’d paid them £1100 to help them out with their cash flow and I had the remaining £1400 ready to pay them on completion.   And at no point had they discussed adding that much to our bill, they hadn’t mentioned extra costs at all and I’d assumed because it was all specified individually in our quote it was covered under that.

I was terrified Steve would get crazy cross again and we’d fall out and it would be as bad as the tile argument at Christmas.  But for some reason I still can’t really fathom he was fine about it.  He said he’d call them up on Monday and discuss it with them.  He didn’t seem to mind whereas I was really cross with them and felt taken advantage of.  I guess he just put his business head on and negotiating is something he’s good at.  He told me off for stressing and asked why I was so upset over it.  How he can be ok over £1400 and flip out over £70 (when he doesn’t even know how much tiles cost and hadn’t measured the space requiring tiling) I don’t know.  (He still thinks he’s right over that argument whereas I know he’s totally wrong, but we’ve moved on!).

So I get to leave it to him to sort out.  I’m not so silly as to think there wouldn’t be hidden charges.  The builder fitted the door for us, and had to buy little bits here and there, so we were expected a couple of hundred more at least to the original quote.  That’s normal and to be expected, but £1400 is a lot of money we don’t have to hand and was a nasty surprise.

So that is where things are at.   I’m feeling very ‘argh’ about it all.   Baby worries, getting fed up being so heavy, not sleeping, being tired and grumpy and tearful all the time isn’t good.    Builders invoices.  House needs tidying and I have no energy or inclination to do anything about it.  I feel like being a hermit and don’t want to go out or see anyone.   As I missed church last week Mum got inundated with questions as to how I was, and I just don’t want to have to keep repeating myself that I’m weary and achey.  So it’s just easier to stay in.  Then I ache if I stand and ache if I sit, ache if I lie down.

The only positive is that during this typing baby is wiggling away again which is reassuring.  But right in my ribs again which is uncomfortable.

9 days until my due date.  Please make a move soon baby.  Please please please.   I want to feel back to myself again!!

Bathroom Completion!!

I think its now safe to say that our bathroom has been done!  We have a working shower, bath, sink and toilet, and how I have missed these things!!  Steve is in the bath now as he apparently has been converted from showers.   I don’t think that’s a good thing as he spends at least an hour with his lap top all set up on a pile of stools and boxes and lies in the bath to watch a film.   It means the bathroom is closed off for ages.   He used to spend a long time in the shower anyway, but his bath time is ridiculous.

Anyway, here’s the before just as a reminder:

photo 2 (9) photo 3 (9)


And the shiny new:

photo 4 (6) photo 3 (14)


It looks so much brighter and fresher in there and I love the look of the shower with it’s big rain head and hand held bit too.  The mosaic border just breaks up the white tiles but keeps it simple, and I think it’s classic but contemporary which is in keeping with the age and style of the house.

Considering how begrudging Steve was, and how little he actually contributed in any decisions or help on organising (other than providing some money for it) he has agreed that it’s been a job well done and it needed doing.  He does this every time.   Fights and grumbles and makes a massive deal out of something then is happy once its done and acknowledges that it’s good.  I wish he could just accept from the outset that it’ll be good and worthwhile and not argue about it so much.  He even seems happy with the amount of money we’ve spent on it.  Maybe he’s done what I suggested and talked to his colleagues about their bathroom costs to see that we’ve actually had a very good deal.

My next mission is to get him to agree that the garden needs making over in time for the summer.  This one is a bit harder as Steve cares nothing for gardens.  He’s said he doesn’t want to put any money into it, as he does not see it as a worthwhile investment.  He said he would never mow the lawn or tend to anything and is being very resistant to my very simple plans to make it Joel safe and friendly.   He feels that his garden growing up was an unkempt mudpit and it did him no harm.   His mum doesn’t agree, and isn’t sure why he feels that way but I’m not happy with how things are now.  It’s a big mess and we cleared it in order to progress so progress we shall.  I just need to keep working on him when he’s in a good mood.

But at least the bathroom is done and I can invite people over and not be embarrassed at the state of it now.  The builders are back tomorrow to fit the door and tighten some bits on the towel rail.  I need to buy a new bath mat to match as Steve tipped the old one which matched all my towels (maybe a few new towels are required to match the new bath mat too) and then it will be done.


38 Weeks

How far along:  38 weeks today.

Total Weight Gained: I seem to have evened out and haven’t put anymore weight on over the past few weeks.  I’m still staying around the same dreaded number but with knowing baby is at least 7lbs 6ozs and due to put 1.2lb a week on, I may get another couple before too much longer I guess.

Maternity Clothes:   And not a lot else!  And even those are getting tight.  I’ve had to give up on my maternity jeggings as they were under bump and too uncomfortable to wear now as they dig into my under ledge!!!  My one pair of maternity pj’s are under bump too and feeling tight which is a shame.   I can still get into a couple of nighties but they’re short sleeved and we’re having a chilly week with lots of morning frost here in the UK so I’d prefer some long sleeved nighties!

Stretch Marks:  Totally.   I have been got good and proper.  I have a giant shiny planet sitting on my middle.

Sleep:    Bit of a mixed bag.   I slept ok last night.  I was up at 4am the previous night.  I guess it just depends.  But if I feel tired in the day I can nap at Mums.  And I did yesterday, I just seem to doze off on the sofa at any moment, even with background noise!!!

Best Moment of the Week:   I don’t know.  Not a lot has happened in the past week!  I’ve had no labour signs.  I’m still waiting on the bathroom completion.   I can’t splodge out in my pj’s for a day at home yet.  I guess I’ve enjoyed sorting through baby clothes and blankets and hanging things up in his wardrobe and general nesting pottering about!!  But again, until these builders depart and my house is my own again I don’t think I’ll feel at ease to be honest!!

Movement:  So much movement and wiggling.   My ribs are really  hurting me!  And I’ve been waking at night with the weight of baby lying on my ribs and pelvis.

Food Cravings:   I wouldn’t say cravings at all, but I’ve felt really tired this week and not bothered to cook!  It’s bad to think how much rubbish I’ve eaten this week and I do feel bad for it.  It’s adding to my chins for sure 😦   We had chippy chips on Friday and an Indian take away on Sunday evening.  Last night I made myself eggy bread and bacon with tomatoes for tea (far too much fried stuff) but I’ve had a strange metallic taste in my mouth a bit like from the first trimester when I couldn’t drink cups of tea and it’s affecting what I want to eat.   I keep thinking about getting started back on Slimming World as it’s so easy and works too, but with everything needing making from scratch I just can’t be bothered right now.   And that doesn’t bode well for when I’m even more sleep deprived!!

Gender:  He’s a little man!

Belly Button:  What belly button?!

What I miss:  I still miss feeling like my old self.  Being pregnant, although such a blessing does become a chore.  It’s a lot to put your body through and as much as I’ve always wanted three children I find myself questionning whether I could do this again!!   That said, I’ve been a lot more healthy this time round compared to with Joel and it’s been an easier pregnancy.

What I’m looking forward to:  Getting that first labour sign!  Its starting to sink in that I might actually have to do this the old fashioned way.   I have two weeks left for things to kick off and then what will happen next remains to be seen.   I am scared of labour.  I don’t mind admitting it.   Having had the induction fail with Joel I’ve had a bad experience and felt the worst pains and stress I could ever have imagined and it was so out of my control.  That is why an elective c-section is appealing to me.  I get to stay calm and despite the extra recovery time I can’t help but think it’s worth it.   But would I be missing out if i didn’t at least attempt the natural, primal womanly pushing?!  There’s no reason why it couldn’t happen properly for me this time.   I maybe just need a bit more faith in my own body which I feel let me down last time.

Milestones:  I am booked in to see the midwife again tomorrow for a 38 week appointment.  Last weeks meeting was an extra one due to the consultant seeing me at 36 weeks and with not having any issues I’m wondering whether to cancel it.  I don’t feel as though I need to go in.  I think everything is fine to be honest.    I feel that I’ve seen them a lot the past month.

Bump Pic:  Its crazy, my jumpers don’t even cover me properly underneath now.  There’s a big gap!!  I look like Mr Greedy 😦

photo 2 (15) photo 1 (17)mr-greedy

Wee Small Hours…… Again…..

So here I am.

Again.  Just before 6am.

I’ve been awake since 4am but just lying in bed feeling as though baby is about to break out through my ribs.

Having got to 5am and no sign of sleep on the horizon at all I decided that I’d be better off using my time cleaning the kitchen so have done the washing up and cleaned the sides down.   There is also a basket of clean laundry eying me up which I could take upstairs and sort through, a few baby things that need hanging in the wardrobe.  But I don’t want to disturb Joel and Steve by pottering too much up there.   I do enjoy hanging baby things up though!!

The builders will be here in a couple of hours and I’ll head to my Mums for a nap I think.  I won’t make it through the day having got up this early.  I did have a little doze on the sofa yesterday whilst Steve and Joel were watching Planes on the TV.  I didn’t mean to.  I normally struggle to switch off from background noise like that but may have had 20 minutes!!!  Ooh, maybe we could make up the pram and change it back from buggy mode.   That would be useful!! And fun!  I’ve missed the pram!!

We had a nice morning with Joel loving the party.   It’s a relatively new place not too far away with a giant wooden climbing frame inside a warehouse.   I had thought it would be quiet being a Sunday morning but how wrong I was.  We couldn’t even park outside so Steve dropped Joel and I off by the doors and had to go further afield.  All Joel’s little nursery friends were there and he went straight off with Trudy to the 0-5 section which he could manage on his own.   But the older kids were in the bigger section and that had rope bridges and climbing nets and he needed Daddy to help him over those bits so I sat with Liz and we had drinks and laughed to see Steve staggering about carrying Joel and Trudy under one arm each to get them over the ropes!  It was a very pleasant way to spend the morning!  And we would certainly go again.  Joel had a good hour and half to run around and play before the lunch and he promptly burst into tears when called away to eat.   We went up to a little room where they’d laid out party food, chicken nuggets and chips, crisps, sandwiches, salad platter, pizza and sausage rolls.   Joel was a bit too tired to eat much at all and nibbled only cucumber and crisps.   He even struggled with his little pot of jelly for pudding.



After lunch there was another 15 minutes left of party time so back they went to play some more.   And quite promptly once the two hours was up, an announcement was made over the tannoy that we had to vacate, so cue lots of upset and hyperactive toddlers who were only pacified by receiving a goody bag!!

Steve took Joel to the car whilst I said goodbyes, and by the time I got to the car Joel had already got into the goodybag to retrieve a chunk of chocolate cake which was smeared all over his face and hands.  I had thought he’d crash out in the car on the drive home but the extra sugar boost seemed to keep him going all afternoon as well!

Then we watched a film together, Joel went to do bouncing outside and we had an Indian for dinner at Steve’s request.   I think I will have to avoid Indian takeaways for the near future.  They just don’t agree with me at the moment!  I had a bhuna with boiled rice, so nothing too heavy but I think that’s to do with my stomach feeling a bit off during the night, never mind the poor baby being extra squished.

So this week I should hopefully get the house back to myself by Wednesday and Steve is rather busy with work and has asked that I keep the baby in until after Friday when he has a new client to film an awards ceremony for which he is already stressed about and having to rearrange cover if I go into labour will be very inconvenient for him.   Hmm.   What are the chances baby has heard that and will come on Friday.  I know I would if I were baby!!  Ha ha!!

Still Cooking….

I really don’t do well at this patience lark.

Every niggle, every twinge, I can’t help but wonder ‘is this it?’

I don’t feel relaxed or rested yet!  The bathroom is still underway with the builders due back on Monday.  They’re hoping to be done by Wednesday which would mean they’d been here for 10 days, although with two weekends in between where we’ve still been without a bath or shower facilities!  Thank goodness my parents live so close and we’ve been popping round for showers and baths in between!  I don’t what we’d have done if they weren’t around.  We’d have had to sneak into the local gym or something?!

There is a lot of progress though.  The tiles are on, albeit not grouted yet.  The sink and toilet are in.  The flooring is down.  The taps are fitted.  All that remains is the shower, the lights, the extractor fan, the heated towel rail and all that plumbing is set up and ready to go.   Oh, and the payment of course!!  Even Steve is coming round to the idea of progress now.  I think because he’s met the builders and they’re nice guys he’s talking about getting them to quote and give ideas for our kitchen extension.  I can’t even think about that this year.  It’ll cost a lot and be such an inconvenience whilst being done I don’t think we should do it for a couple of years to be honest and focus on the garden and hall stairs and landing.  But we’ll see.

I’ve been struggling to sleep again.   Last night I woke at 1.30 feeling really strange.  I couldn’t work out if I was going to be sick or what, and lay there for a short while just wondering if it was going to be a big body clear out.  It wasn’t.  And I went back to sleep an hour later.   And now I’m awake at 5am again, and as I lay there thinking about a bowl of Kellogg’s Frosties I just felt hungry so have come down to eat, and wrap a present!

Joel has a birthday party today.  It’s a boy from his nursery who is going to be 4.   He likes pirates and Star Wars.   Star Wars stuff is really expensive it turns out, so I’ve bought him a pirate card game with good reviews on Amazon!!  I had bought a pirate book, but decided it’s a bit young for a four year old and he’s likely already got it if that’s the case.  I did forget the wrapping paper though and part of my weird dreaming stage has involved stressing about how to wrap this present up today so I must find the sellotape soon and see whether the scrap of boyish non-Christmas paper I’ve located will do!

Dreams are so strange at the moment.  With worrying about wrapping this gift I was dreaming that we had to stop to buy paper on the way and as I was trying to wrap in the car on the way the gift was getting smaller and smaller and I was frantically bulking it out with extra paper and it ended up being the size of a stamp and would get lost easily!

The other night I dreamt that the neighbours let themselves into our house with brooms to sweep the frogs away, and I was confused as we don’t have frogs, but then we did and they were all in the conservatory, big greeny brown ones, and when I went into the garden I was stepping on them, so we got brushes to sweep them away and went to our local Premiership football stadium and were in the tunnel trying to crochet but frogs were there too.  I have no idea why I was thinking about any of that other than the crochet as I’ve been trying to learn and failing miserably!!

So here I am.   No other signs that any baby arrival is imminent.  I’ve been having a few more tummy tightenings but no ‘show’ as yet.  My stomach is giant and the skin has gone all shiny from the stretched stretch marks.   I’m aching all the time, and trying to nest as best I can.   I have not had any inclination to clean kitchen cupboards or anything like that but I am stressing about getting the nursery and upstairs tidy and clean which I can’t do at the moment with afore mentioned builders.   I’ve washed every bit of baby linen and clothing I can get my hands on, rearranged the baby wardrobe and chest of drawers to put all Joel’s stuff in the drawers now and all baby’s stuff in the wardrobe.  And I think I want some shelves putting up too.   All to help with storage and places to put things.   I don’t think I have enough places to put things yet, and I want to be organised and be able to put my hands on something when needed without too much bother.

Which is why I’m cross i can’t find the sellotape right now!  Unless Steve left it in his garage after his Christmas wrapping?  Worth a check I think.

BING!! The bun is done…. 37 Weeks

I am officially at full term today.  Hello 37 weeks.   It’s like we long to get here, we strive to get here to know that baby is well and grown and ready to pop at any moment through the next five week window but man, it’s uncomfortable, achey and tiresome as well!

I’m so glad to have been able to finish work.   I don’t know how women can work up to their due dates at all.  I am needing a nap in the day to get through.  I find without my support belt baby is just headbutting into my bladder which can be both painful and uncomfortable at the same time.

I had a lot of Braxton Hicks yesterday through the day and evening.  Steve was actually starting to look a bit worried.  He is still telling me to have the baby on a Friday evening so he can be around and go back to work on the Monday without having to change his schedule!  Apparently the worst day for him work wise would be the 24th January.  Ok then.  I’d like to see him try and keep a baby in if it wants to come out!!

Anyway, here’s my countdown as I wait for my Tesco delivery man.  Ive decided going to the supermarket to do a weeks shop and push a big trolley round is not going to happen now for at least a month!  I just can’t do it anymore!!  I can’t even manage to push it round the bends as my pelvis just clicks and hurts too much.

How far along:  37 weeks today.

Total Weight Gained: Ok, honestly, 2 1/2 stones.   I need to lose at least 3 once this baby is born.  that’s my challenge for Christmas 2014.  But Steve is still heavier than me so I feel ok with it.

Maternity Clothes:   And not a lot else!

Stretch Marks:  I’ve officially been attacked by the stretch mark monster.  I guess this time it doesn’t make much difference since I’ve not worn a bikini since my honeymoon anyway!!  I just wish I’d worn them more before Joel stretched me beyond repair!!

Sleep:    It’s not been good this week.   And not even baby related!  Steve has been snoring and suffering with flu recovery which makes him horrid to sleep next to.   I think due to all his quatar he’s been having issues with morning breath and one whiff in my face has been able to wake me up from slumber in the wee small hours.   Grr.  He’s normally ok with his oral hygiene so it is just an illness thing and if he knew I think he’d be mortified but yack, its been nasty.   Also Joel has been waking every night around 1am to come in and have a cuddle which although very nice, is a bit of a pain as he doesn’t settle, waits until you’re nearly asleep before saying ‘Mummy, time for you to take me back to Joel’s bed now’ and making me get up into the cold night to tuck him back in.   Some nights he’s done this three times.  Yawn.

Best Moment of the Week:   I’d have to say seeing the 36 week scan.  And realising that I had a picture of baby’s face which was amazing.  I think he looks like Joel did as a newborn!!

Movement:  IArgh!  Ouch and oh my.   Baby keeps getting hiccups which I feel in my bottom and general nether regions.  Very awkward and weird.  He likes kneeing me in the ribs quite high up.   And squirming.  And the hicks have been a very strange experience too.   Not to mention the frequent bladder squeezing.  And headbutting more piles out.  Sorry if you’re eating.  It’s all quite gruesome down there at the moment.

Food Cravings:   I’m just eating lighter meals and smaller portions at the moment.  I have two big tins of grapefruit looking at me suggestively though.

Gender:  He’s a little man!

Belly Button:  All flat and inside out!  I showed my 5 year old nephews and they were a bit freaked out by it all!!  Scarred them for life no doubt!!

What I miss:  Being this close to the end I feel as though I’m forgetting what life was like before being a giant whale like woman.   I know it’s not quite as long as an elephants gestation but it’s nearly an entire year and I am just thinking how nice it would be to have my body back to myself again!!

What I’m looking forward to:  Getting the builders out from doing our bathroom and having the house to myself for hopefully a couple of weeks rest before baby arrives!!  I feel that I’m missing out on crucial nesting time and I just want to be able to sit quietly, rock in the nursing chair, fold baby clothes and wash stuff!!

Milestones:  I guess the next milestone will be getting the baby out.   I am seeing the midwife tomorrow to discuss my birth plan.  Then its a waiting game.  Tick tock little man.

Bump Pic:

photo 2 (14) photo 1 (16)


This is Joel’s little hand feeling my stomach lurch about earlier today!!

photo 2 (10)


Braxton Hicks

I was a lady of leisure this morning!

I went to meet a friend for coffee, which is something I’ve never really done before!  Well, i say coffee, but it was hot chocolate as I don’t like coffee at all.  Whilst sitting there we chatted for nearly two hours and I started getting strange stomach pressures where I thought baby was pushing out and making my stomach tight.  My friend told me she thought that it was Braxton Hicks as she’d had the same with her second baby.

I have had these a bit recently and thought nothing of them but they seem to be stepping up a pace at the moment!

My whole stomach is tightening and I’m having to ‘breath’ it out as I’m not sure what else to do!!

If it’s a sign that baby is getting ready, I hope he holds off as we’ve lost the sink from the bathroom and it’s all freshly plastered today but still a good few days work to go!  Argh!!  I need that completing before baby arrives else I won’t be able to come back home.  I wonder if I could go to a luxury hotel for a few days if it weren’t done!!