Unsympathetic Husband

I feel a bit miffed to say the least at the moment.

I’m a bit under the weather again.  I’m nearly 15 weeks pregnant, had bronchitis, diagnosed with bronchial asthma which is brought on by cold weather, and it’s jolly cold outside, and I’ve caught a cold and the past three days I’ve walked to work as Hubby has been out at early meetings.

This morning, he was in, and at 7.50 I asked him for a lift to work as I was feeling rather tired, I’ve not been sleeping well, and the cold was exacerbating my chest.

‘Can’t you walk’ he said, ‘it’s not that far’,

‘Can’t you walk and let me have the car today’ I said.  ‘I’ve walked every day so far this week, and today I’m tired and not feeling great’.

‘Have a sick day then’ he replied turning over and ignoring me.

‘I’ll take the car and you can walk Izzy up to then drive her home again’

‘I don’t want to walk that far, and I need the car for this morning, you’ll have to walk’

Honestly.  He thinks I’m all fit and well and should be doing more than normal because ‘it’s good for me’.  Well, I’ll be the judge of what’s good for me thank you.  So he made me wait, and got up slowly (he is infuriatingly lazy in a morning) and then by 8.15 he was ready to drive up with me.  I drove, because frankly I’m a better driver and he seems to make a car lurch too much which makes me nauseous and I got to work for 8.25 which is later than I’d hoped.

And on the way he grumbled I was ignoring him.  And then he made a comment that he’d never known a pregnant woman to be so tired in pregnancy!!  I asked what pregnant women he’d ever known.  The answer – his mum.   He was 14 at the time and she was having her fourth pregnancy.  I think that’s a bit different to having a first baby.

The bottom line is, he thinks I’m faking the way I feel.  He’s being unsupportive and thinks that I should be fine walking to and from work every day, cleaning the house, doing the laundery, cooking the meals without complaining that I’m weary!  He hasn’t even run the vacuum round in the 6 months he’s lived there.

How can he not understand that I’m exhausted, my body is growing another being, my energy is used up very quickly, my emotions are all over the place and I’m feeling the most unloved and unappreciated that I’ve ever felt.  And when I’ve tried to tell him how I feel he brushes it off as ‘pregnancy brain’.  I think that if we’re going be friendly at all during the next 5-6 months, he’s going to have to come to a sharp realisation that he’s going to have to grow up, be a man, and understand that I’m not myself, I need more support and nothing is going to be the same as it was ever again!

And then he wonders why I’m not feeling the mood for anything when he decides to be nice and make a move.

EDIT: – Ok, to be fair to him, I am as grumpy before bed as he is in a morning, and he rang up just after nine to apologise for being grumpy with me this morning.  So we have made friends again.  I still feel we have issues about his lack of understanding to how I’m feeling being pregnant, but I wouldn’t folk to worry that we have an unhappy marriage because that really isn’t true!  We are happy 85% of the time, and 15% we argue and get cross before making up, and that’s what makes me rant on these blogs!!!

I feel better now though.  And he apologised first 🙂


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